Firsts

WARNING ADVISORY

No time or patience for a loooong-drawn out explanation?

...then please do yourself a favor and scroll down to the photos.
 Still reading? 

You were warned!

A few days after my last post (Where has the time gone?)

I was sitting out by the pool one evening, thinking about the rapidly

upcoming and increasing end-of-school duties, 

when out of nowhere a random thought crashed through.

Being a Gemini, and sort of considered a ditzy blond (Nice 'N Easy 108)

rapidly jumping from one train of thought to another was not so unusual. 

What WAS out of the ordinary, however, was being blindsided

by such an unexpected and confusing topic.

"NO MORE FIRSTS!"

Without rhyme or reason, a raging, emotional river spilled forth

carrying this uninvited, unwelcome and heart piercing dagger...

catching me completely off guard.

I won't compare what was going on in my mind to a tornado

(it was more like a West Texst dust devil) but definitely stirring up more

thoughts and emotions than I was prepared to deal with that evening.

Over the next several weeks, like a pesky mosquito, the thought remained and

no matter how much swatting I did it continued loudly buzzing in my head

and penetrating my heart...draining it like a slow, leaky faucet.

Drip...drip...drip.

Had I really experienced all the exciting and wonderful firsts that life has to offer?

In the quiet stillness of the deep night, I would find myself wide eyed.

Slipping from beneath the sheet, I would tip-toe outside by the pool and breathe

in the warm air while gazing up at the heavens for a sign.  I wasn't depressed, just

curious as to where the thought was birthed and the timing of its arrival.

Believing that everything happens "on time" and for a purpose, I sought answers.

So what that I'd already experienced the normal "firsts" that most people my age

have, or that I'd dreamt of as a child, along with several I hadn't dreamed of
nor WANTED to experiece, but made it through not too damaged. 

First crush

First job

First apartment of my own

First marriage (NOT with first true love)

First child = daughter (38)

First new car

Second marriage (WITH first true love)

First child with first love = son (29)

First house

First muscle car!  (I feel the need for speed!!!!)

First above ground pool

First in-ground pool  (MUCH better!)

Job = not first, but the first one I LOVE

First vacation to Sanibel Island

First DisneyWorld vacation

First child's graduation

First computer

First children's books written

First women's adult books written

First camera

First blog

Anyway, you get the idea, and though some of them may seem strange to you -

especially the ones dealing with technology, those actually mean a lot to me

because of my fear of anything electronic!  I'm still trying to figure out how to work

On Demand with the television remote control!

So school ends and we leave for our yearly three weeks on Sanibel Island and, 

of course, the thought tagged along, too.  However, instead of it whispering:

"No more firsts" it became "Is this all there is?" 
    Not that I have a problem with that because I live an extremely blessed life, but it did

give me something to think about during our two day drive to Florida.  We had a

wonderful vacation.  A few days after returning I downloaded the 6,247 photos I'd
taken!  That's right!  Dwight says I get "subject fixated!"  My theory =
who knows when / if I'll EVER see whatever I'm photographing again?! 
And even though it might be the same animal, it might not be doing the same
thing again!  Am I right?!  There IS a method to my madness.

So as I'm going through the photos and realizing just how many new folders I'm

having to make, I realize how many "FIRSTS" I experienced during those 3 1/2 weeks! 

Now if you've read my other entries, you know that this is by no means the first gator

I've photographed.  However, this particular alligator DID provide me with a first.

 We were taking a stroll in the Everglades when we happened upon this 6-7 foot

guy.  Well, you know me...I have this belief that as long as I have my camera then

the wildlife knows I'm not a threat; and of course, I carry on a continued dialogue with

whatever I'm photographing, believing they can understand my every word!

I also figured this big fellow wasn't hungry, otherwise he'd be down in the water 

waiting for some unsuspecting bird to get too close to the edge and then...whoosh!

As we get closer, he doesn't give us any indication he's even aware of our presence.

Never having photographed an open-mouthed alligator, I make my simple request.

His mouth immediately opens.  YEA!  I'm so excited.  My husband, not so much, fearing

that we might have to run, and even though he's on a diet, he's NOT in any shape to

outrun an angry or hungry alligator.  We continue nonchalantly (well...as much as that 

is possible in this situation) walking past and as we do, I realize the gator is opening

his mouth even wider.  Then I determine that the poor fellow is simply sunning himself

and enjoying the coolness of the grass.  (This determination comes from having 

watched gator shows where they explain that if you look in a gator's

mouth and its throat is closed off, it's merely in a resting state.) 

So when we get directly in front of him, I decide to kneel down and click away.

And I was right.  He could've cared less that I was kneeling just a few feet in front of him.

I took a lot of pictures from each side and from the front, all the while my husband

was standing behind me ready to grab me and run, or so he said!  He did make me 

promise, though, that if the gator lunged for us I'd throw my camera in its mouth.

"Of course!" I said...but I'm glad I wasn't put to the test because I LOVE my new camera!!!

After peering into his mouth and seeing all the disgusting remainders of something in

there, I now understand why people who get attacked by a gator die from infections.

I've seen only dead armadillo's on the road before and Sanibel has NEVER had any of

these armored creatures on the island, but for some reason and some how the

population is growing.  I was out for a morning walk and I guess she was, too,

cause she just strolled out of the bushes to my right and gingerly walked across the road.

We were driving down the causeway one afternoon and I looked out to see this Great

Blue Heron.  At the time she was a little further out in the water and was ramming her beak 

at something.  We pulled over and I grabbed my camera.  By the time I got out and was 

ready to click away, I couldn't help but loudly laugh at the huge catfish she had speared.

She turned around...looked at me...then turned back as if embarrassed.

I'm not a mind reader, but I knew exactly what was going through her head:

"What on earth was I thinking?!?!?!"

This was a first for me because Herons and Egrets eat their meals whole, and she knew 

there was NO WAY that catfish was gonna fit down her throat! 

As we drove away, she returned to the water to resume fishing and a group

of seagulls came up to fight over it.  The fish was bigger than all of them

put together but it was pretty comical watching them try.

Never before had I witnessed a hawk eating, but twice this vacation I did.

I watched him fly overhead just as he landed on this branch, his mouth opened, and down

it went over a large grasshopper.  I only got this shot but you can see one of the legs

still hanging out of its mouth.  Poor grasshopper didn't stand a chance.
This next photo is graphic, so if you get upset at seeing part of the circle of life, skip it.

I was out walking early one evening and as I turned a corner, I saw a hawk in the grass

eating something.  He immediately grabbed it and took off flying to a tree. 

As I got closer, I realized he had killed a baby possum.

We were returning to the condo one afternoon and I happened to glance over to my left

and saw this giant iguana lazily lounging on this tree.  By the time I could tell Dwight what

I saw, we were already passed it and he didn't believe me.  I grabbed my camera,

jumped out of the truck (good thing we were going slow!) and hurried over to where it

was.  It didn't bother Mister Big as I stepped through the jungle area to get to him;

he was just enjoying the heat as much as I enjoyed photograhing him enjoying it! 

Needless to say...my husband had to eat his words! 

I was fascinated with his hands.

Isn't he adorable?  I wish I could've picked him up and given him a BIG hug!

When we returned to Mesquite, I was talking to my friend who lives on Sanibel 
and she informed me that all iguana sighting are supposed to be called in to the 
Sanibel Police Deparment or the Wildlife Refuge for removal since they're 
not native to the island and are to blame for the decline in lizards, tree crabs 
and other creatures.  Who knew?!

I watched this osprey swoop down in the ocean and retrieve this large fish.

Nothing new about this; seen it lots of time.  However, whether the fish was too heavy

or the osprey too weak, or the wind too strong...for some reason he was unable to

maintain altitude and return to the nest or a tree = a first for me to witness.

Try as he did...and he DID try, it wasn't gonna happen.  So what do you do?

You provide the lady with the camera another first = osprey dining on the ground!

The next day when we were out and about I heard something stirring in the grass

a little ahead and to my left.  I turned and saw this little lady emerging.

A juvenile otter!

She turned...took one look at me and

across the road she headed.

My first otter on land.  And speaking of otters...

we went to another wildlife refuge in Florida and was surprised to

see some more otters.  I just wish the sunlight where they were had been better.

Aren't they cute?  Of course, the water they're lounging in leaves a lot to be desired!

Enjoying a lazy afternoon.

I've seen plenty of pigs (as a child even had the pleasure more than once of

"slopping the hogs" at my grandparents.)  But their pigs were fenced in.  I had

never seen wild pigs/hogs, and we watched them destroy plant after plant after plant.

Geez, talk about making a pig of yourself!

I had never seen an American Oystercatcher.

I researched them when we got back and found that the pair I saw must have

been just passing through and stopped to rest on their way back north. 

They weren't skittish at all.  In fact we waded around together for almost 30

minutes and then I was the one who gave up because the heat was just too much!

The next morning, I was able to enjoy another first.

For some reason on this day, the pelicans were fishing VERY close to the shore,

so I was able to get a few good pictures of them successfully catching a good breakfast.

Can't you just imagine what that fish is thinking right now?!

Down the hatch!

Since they swallow the fish whole, I guess the fish dies from suffocation?

I got to see several juvenile Red Bellied Woodpeckers!

"Yummy!  A nice juicy worm for breakfast."

His mom would be sooooo proud.  If you look closely above his eye, you can see just a

tiny bit of the red coming in.  When he's grown, he's gonna make a very handsome mate!

The next series of pictures are of a juvenile Yellow Crowned Night Heron who either

didn't listen and watch his parents very well, or perhaps he's merely tired of dining

on the usual small fish, crabs and eels, or perhaps he's just a rebel.

"Ah, a snake!  It's a lot bigger than the small water snakes I've eaten,

but maybe I won't get hungry as fast.  I think I'll give it a try."

"Let's see.  I'm not sure exactly the best way to go about this.

Would you just be still already?!?!?!"

"Oh, no you don't!  Don't EVEN try to bite me, buddy!"

"Teach you!"

"Lunch is served!"

"I'm not quite sure the best way to do this!"

"Down ya go."

It reminded me of slurping down a piece of spaghetti.  When he was finished, he gave

me a look of "You didn't think I could do it, did ya?!" and headed on down the road!

And he was right...I DIDN'T think he could do it!

There were several other firsts: we finally got to see the elusive bobcat that somehow

appeared on Sanibel a couple of years ago; probably walked across the causeway during

the night and wasn't spotted by one of the toll takers.  I got a picture, but it's really not in

focus and I don't want you to strain your eyes!

We also saw a hammerhead shark that looked to be about 8-9 feet. 

Lemon sharks are fairly common to see, but not hammerheads.

Each year I pick a favorite vacation photo, so I'll close with this year's pick.

Number 6,242.  It was our last night and we had gone out to take our final sunset

stroll on the beach.  It was early evening so we had the beach almost to ourselves,

with the exception of a few fishermen on the pier.  Just a few minutes after commenting

 how I wish we could see dolphins again, these two appeared further out.

We watched them frolick and play and though I was able to get some pictures, their

distance made it hard - not to mention never knowing exactly where they were going to

surface next.  We continued our walk; turned to take one last look down the beach;

and as we turned back around, I glanced over and got this sweet shot.

In that one instance, the "no more firsts" thought returned, but when this mystical creature 

and her partner came close and she rolled on her side and seemed to wink at me,

the grip of this thought was immediately released. 

Its power to inhibit my mind and heart was gone. 

No longer would it be capable of weaving itself into a picture of an unfulfilled dream. 

I've accepted the fact that I will probably never be a published author,

but I can continue writing chidren's books for the babies and grandbabies of friends.

I may never be the mother-of-the-bride or groom, but I can respect, support

and love the decisions of my children.

I may never get to be a Granny, but I can love all the babies and grandbabies

of friends and family.

So even if this IS all there is...this is more than I EVER dreamed I deserved

and much more than I ever dreamed there was to dream.

So is my wish for you.

And to Diane, my sister, my friend, my sweet, beautiful (inside and out,) witty,

talented, loving, faithful number-one fan and constant cheerleader, I THANK YOU

for the unending encouragement for me to keep doing what I love.  Imagine if...